Big Bang 2010 Master Post: In Becoming Who We Are

[errant_jane]

Fic title: In Becoming Who We Are
Pairing: Jensen/JDM, Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Word count: ~82,700

Summary: Fresh out of school with a degree from the University of Washington, Jensen meets and falls for Jeff Morgan. He may not know what he wants to do with his life, but for the first time since leaving Texas, he feels like things are coming together. Jeff seems like the perfect guy, right up until it all falls apart, and Jensen is left wondering where he went wrong.

A couple failed relationships and a few years later, Jensen's decided that one-night stands are preferable to dates. He's got his friends and his roommate, Sophia, for everything non-sex related, after all. Until Sophia decides to move in with her boyfriend and Jensen's stuck trying to find a new roommate. At Sophia's insistence, Jensen meets Jared Padalecki and the two become fast friends. Only, the more they get to know each other, the more obvious it is that there's something there. But Jensen is unwilling to risk losing Jared's friendship for the possibility of more. Unfortunately, if he doesn't get things figured out, he might lose Jared anyway.





Part I: Where We End
One | Two | Three

Part II: Where We Begin
One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six

Timestamps:

♥ Lesser Men (Have Put Up Better Fights) - Misha/Clare, 2600 words
♥ If You Don't Ask, You'll Never Know - Jared/Jensen, 3500 words
♥ The Way It's Meant To Be - Jared/Jensen, 2400 words



ART: I cannot even begin to properly express how giddy and delighted I am by egotists' gorgeous art. She did an entire site!!! There are not enough squeaky dolphin noises in the world! Please be sure to stop by her Art Post and give her love. She went way above and beyond, and was an absolute joy to work with! ♥♥♥

Author's Notes: No lie, this story started out as a semi-pervy daydream to get me through a boring day at work. Many people were involved in getting it from there to here. Please forgive me if this gets a little long...

Thanks to wendy and thehighwaywoman for all the hard work they put into throwing this shindig. So awesome!!

Thanks to laulan for audiencing and fact-checking for me, in spite of a hectic RL schedule. ♥

Many thanks to my CAPS OF AWESOMENESS BETAS, elizardbits and aggybird both of whom took care of the most egregious of typos and homophones as well as trying to induce me into the cult of the Oxford comma. They did it on short notice with a quick turnaround, all without mocking some of my truly horrifying mistakes. Any remaining flaws or imperfections are an indication that this story was hand-made and should be taken as a sign of its uniqueness.

Thanks again to egotists for betaing ON TOP of all of the amazing art! And being very kind with all of my "Oh, one more thing!" requests and "Wait, how do I format this?" questions. I really can't overstate how awesome and helpful she's been.

FINALLY, endless thanks and love (and promised timestamps) to rhythmsextion. She helped with EVERYTHING, from beginning to end, including staying up late with me while I did all of the formatting to post. Honestly, I sort of feel like she should be credited with co-authorship at this point. To say that she audienced each paragraph as I wrote it would be only the mildest of exaggerations. There is absolutely no way I would have been able to write this without her encouragement and enthusiasm. This story is really for her, she's just letting me share it with everyone else. ♥

OMG, it's really late/early as I'm writing this, so if I forgot anyone, please let me know and I'll fix it asap. I'm a little bit stupid right now...

ETA: fayedoll is most awesomely providing a permanent download link for the PDF here. Yay! ♥!!!

Comments

[wolfish-willow.livejournal.com]

Okay, it's way too late/early for me to start reading this, but I'm soo excited about it. I've been counting the days and it's here! I'll be sure to start reading as soon as I'm less sleep deprived.

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

Aww!! Thank you!! That makes me happy!!!

[magser.livejournal.com]

This is the first big bang that has been posted that I even had the urge to read. Look forward to settling down to a good read later!

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

*beams* Thank you!!!

[rhythmsextion]

AAAHHHH!!! IT IS UP IT IS UP IT IS UP!!! Now I can read it AGAIN in all its shiny, amazing glory. (DO NOT MOCK ME FOR THIS. I AM SO IN LOVE WITH THIS FIC YOU HAVE NO IDEA.)

And YES. THIS STORY IS ALL MINE. MINE, MINE, MINE. But since I'm such a giving person, I'm letting other people behold the awesome, too. :D

How the hell are you FUNCTIONING right now? Seriously.

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

I STILL KIND OF CAN'T BELIEVE IT, Y'KNOW?!? (AHHAAA, I would NEVER mock you for this!! It makes me feel like a super special snowflake! ♥♥♥)

It IS!! Totally nice of you to share and stuff!!

I'm really not yet. I am still quite zombiefied. Braaaiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnns...

[cjandre.livejournal.com]

I would swear that I posted on this - but I can't find any hard evidence to that effect, so I will just risk repeating myself, rather than risk letting this wonderful romance go without a word of thanks or praise from me.

;-)


This is a wonderful, classic romance. I ached with Jensen all the way through - even when I wanted to smack him upside the head for being so oblivious. Jared was ADORABLE and the whole scene with Jeff and Tom in part two was EXCELLENT. I liked how you resisted melodrama and went for realistic emotions.

Thanks for all the hard work you obviously put in on this!

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

Thank you so so much!!! I'm actually a big fan of the romance genre, so that's wonderful to hear!! ♥

Thank you for the lovely comment!!

[ethrosdemon.livejournal.com]

Wait, where is my acknowledgment for babying you? WTF?

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

It is in the strength of our continued friendship and the fact that I'm not making you read this. ♥

[non-timebo-mala.livejournal.com]

Yay! I'm super excited to get to this but a quick question - is the Jensen/JDM explicit and is the ending pairing J2? Just something I'd like to know before I get reading. Thanks! ;]

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

The Jensen/JDM is explicit (hope that doesn't deter you!). And Yes!! Ultimately, it is J2 (OTP of my heart!!! *g*).

[non-timebo-mala.livejournal.com]

No, it won't. :D I'll still read it, definitely - just wanted to make sure OTP was the ending pairing. ;]

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

Hee! Of course! No worries there!!

[mjluvspolar.livejournal.com]

I loved this fic, like really alot! Lovely mix of quirky, angsty, h/c and hottie's getting it on. Nothing there not to like. Also this has got to be one of the funniest lines of the story:

"No, be not angered, coffee god"

Seriously, Claire and Misha ROCK.

Have I mentioned I loved this fic? Cause I really, really did. Thanks for sharing...I'm off now to read everything else you have posted! ~_^

MJ

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

*beams* THANK YOU!!! I'm so glad you enjoyed it!!! ♥

Thank you so so much!!!

[xcziel.livejournal.com]

I SO LOVE THIS. IT IS BEAUTIFUL. I suck at comments but... I added this to my memories as soon as I finished reading. You are made of awesome sexy, witty, wistful, angsty bantering writerliness! <3<3

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

*beams* THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! Naw! I'm so glad you enjoyed it!!! ♥

[hils.livejournal.com]

OMG! I loved this! Even the Jensen/JDM stuff who I don't even really ship. Will be reccing :)

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

Yay!! Thank you so much!!

[deanvica23.livejournal.com]

Thanks i adore this style of fics a little jensen hurt, jensen bottom as i like. yu think to ake a pdf of the fic?

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

Thank you!! I did (eventually) make a PDF!! It's available here (http://www.sendspace.com/file/eh03ay)!

[dolnmoon.livejournal.com]

This was such a beautifully told story. I got so lost in this fic I was disappointed when it ended. Thanks for sharing.

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

Aww, thank you so much for reading! I'm glad you enjoyed it!!

permalink for the pdf? <3

[fayedoll.livejournal.com]

Not sure if you like the idea (if not let me know and I'll take it down right away!) but I put your wonderful fic up on my server for permanent hosting. Unlike any hosting site this won't ever run out or give you pop-up windows. Please feel free to share the link, too!
http://www.dpscanlations.forever-more.org/fanfics/BigBang2010/In_Becoming_Who_We_Are.pdf

thanks so much for providing a pdf download in the first place! :D

Re: permalink for the pdf? <3

[errant-jane.livejournal.com]

OMG that's so incredibly AWESOME!!! Thank you so so much!! ♥!!!

[stdnt1427.livejournal.com]

GAH! A J-cubed story that features Seattle and the UW as characters!!! I've not even finished the first chapter and I already love this!

Also: I caught the Dave Matthews reference with the names of the two parts. Grace is Gone is a favorite of mine :)

[reliand.livejournal.com]

I can't wait to read this sometime this week! It looks lovely and sounds fantastic...I do have a quick question though. Is the soundtrack downloadable or is the artwork the only thing that is available? Sorry if I'm just being silly but I can't seem to find a link :/

[speedcat93.livejournal.com]

This is an amazing story. I've spent a few hours reading it and I must say that I couldn't take my eyes off of it.
I love how you took your time to explain how Jensen became how is now, and that the road of getting together with Jared wasn't that easy, because that's what real life is about, growing up and finding the right person is not (usually) a walk in the park.
I've seen that you posted some timestamps, I'm off to read them now. Thanks for sharing this with us.
Mind if I friend you? I wouldn't want to miss any of this.
Bye ;-)

[nyoka.livejournal.com]

Congrats! ☆ Your fic is recced here (http://community.livejournal.com/sawedoff_recs/80811.html) at sawedoff_recs.

[pintsighs.livejournal.com]

This was incredible! I couldn't stop reading; you're an amazing storyteller, and I fell in love with every single character.

[la-sigh.livejournal.com]

Had to let you know that this story is outstanding !! Wonderful dialog, crisp, sharp characters and a love story to sigh for. Thank you so much I truely enjoyed it !!

[hannahbellejude.livejournal.com]

Great story! I didn't intend to spend so much time reading today but once I started I just couldn't stop till I finished.

I like the way you made the breakup JDM's fault without making him totally evil - very realistic. Your Misha is pretty funny. And I LOVE the way you wrote the boys both as individuals and as the cutest couple ever. Thank you!

[foxlives.livejournal.com]

Hi there, this fic has been recced here (http://community.livejournal.com/spnroundtable/253790.html) at the SPN Roundtable. :)

[matchboximpala.livejournal.com]

I realized that though I rec'd this recently, I probably didn't leave a comment. I so enjoyed this story. I am not a fan of JDM/JA fic so I was a little hesitant to read it, but the fact that it ended up J2 in the end encouraged me. Now I am so glad I did read it. It was funny, and touching, and though I think both boys could have been a bit less dense, I really loved how their relationship developed. I'm excited that in coming here to post I found the timestamps, which I plan to read tonight. I printed out the list of your fic, too, and plan to explore over the next few weeks. If I start spamming you with praise, you can tell me to give it a rest!

[bronbrons.livejournal.com]

I just finishes reading this, I loved it. One of my favourites ever :)

[j2wincestotp.livejournal.com]

Know that I'm so late in reading this, but I wanted to say that I absolutely loved this fic to death and thank you for writing it! Hope to see something as long as this from you again!

[harperackles.livejournal.com]

This was complete awesomeness. I actually loved the parts with Jeff. I mean obviously Jared is better, but I seriously love Jeff (I might have a Daddy kink of my own). Your writing is amazing and witty and clever and all the characters are perfect and I loved this fic very very much.

[ou-peachus.livejournal.com]

Hi. So I wanted to let you know I posted a link here: http://ou-peachus.livejournal.com/248410.html

Like I said on my journal, I wasn't going to read this. But I'm sooo very glad I did.

[deanvica23.livejournal.com]

i will like to know if you have a pdf for the timestamps
thanks.

Just lovely

[jocelyn-sa.livejournal.com]

Romantic, realistic, and sexy in all the right ways.

[glenien.livejournal.com]

I don't know how I managed to survive inside the fandom without reading this series, but I'm totally heads over heels over it. Like, I want to have babies with this fic. And its timestamps. Please, just- ignore me I have a lot of feelings at the moment. *sobs happy tears in the corner*

[steeple-claydon.livejournal.com]

I just listened to Chemm80's podfic of this story. I loved it so, so much. Your characterization is just stellar; each person is distinct and interesting, but it's subtle and believable. And the relationships are real, too; no villains, just people who fuck up sometimes. Thanks so much for sharing. Now to the timestamps!

[luckyn02.livejournal.com]

just had the absolute pleasure of rereading this again, after a hiatus from fandom! :)

I love how clever your writing is, how visceral and lush it is. I'm such a hardcore j2 otp shipper... how did you get me all twisted up about Jensen/Jeff??!

gorgeous and interesting take in the sexual politics and relationships. your Jensen/Jeff came across scorching-hot, even more so than J2 (to me), and I wonder whether it was because the power dynamics between Jeff and Jensen have a sharper, more skewed gradient than J2. Lol, this also informs the reader of their own smutty proclivities!!! *fans self*

tl;dr: loved this, your Jensen/Jeff was otp frontier breaking unf, and am in awe of your deft hand in writing what has become a fandom classic!